


Five Reasons Dean Winchester Should Have Been Born A Girl

by meretricula



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, five things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-04
Updated: 2010-01-04
Packaged: 2017-10-05 18:21:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/44688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meretricula/pseuds/meretricula
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dude. Chicks with guns are hot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five Reasons Dean Winchester Should Have Been Born A Girl

1.

Dude. Chicks with guns are hot. Chicks with guns they actually know how to _use_ are even hotter. Take Lara Croft. I mean, Tomb Raider was a shitty movie by anyone's standards, but Dean went to see it three times, and as fantastic as Angelina Jolie's breasts are, they only would have gotten him to shell out once if it hadn't been for those sweet-looking firearms on her hips.

Dean knows enough shit about guns to make Lara Croft look like a swooning Scarlett O'Hara. He definitely wins on the hotness scale. Come on, if Dean were a chick, _he_'d do himself. Herself.

Okay maybe that's not such a good example. But if a really hot gun-toting lesbian came along?

Only thing hotter than one gun-toting lesbian is two of them. Making out. Naked.

And if Dean were a girl, he would know first-hand.

2.

Chicks can wear high heels without that whole cross-dressing thing. Which is not to say that Dean is bitter over the fact that he's four whole years older than Sam and the bastard has the nerve to be taller than him. Of course not.

Get a pair of those black leather platform combat boots, with all the buckles and maybe steel toes, and he can finally tower over Sammy like a proper older brother should. Wait. Older sister.

Failing that, at least it isn't _embarrassing_ to be shorter than your little brother if you're a girl.

3.

Some estrogen might come in handy hunting, too. Dean can charm the pants off of pretty much anything female, but Sam does all right, too, with his earnest puppy-dog eyes and baby-face, and neither of them is much good with guys. Dean can't really tone down his alpha-male vibes; Sam's better at nodding understandingly and not making snarky remarks, but still. Guys spill a lot more to a pair of hot tits than to a slightly shady-looking man in a beat-up leather jacket.

Which is not to say that Dean would _give up_ charming the pants off of pretty much everything female, because, hello, gun-toting lesbians.

4.

Multiple orgasms.

What, you need more explanation?

5.

Sam would die before he'd ever admit it, but he's always kind of had a thing for older women.


End file.
